I've never drunkenly ugly-cried as a result of a sporting event, but I did watch AmandaB do so after competition-chugging liquor in a VIP ROOM/Storage Room where we had sat next to stacks of toilet paper rolls. It was epic. And then the Patriots lost.
I, however, had already watched the Seahawks lose several times. So many times, in fact, that we did not make it to the playoffs. So many times that the owner of the bar regularly gave me jocular reminders about my Sea"Chickens." I spent a lot of time with my head in my hands, disappointed. But then I ordered another beer and rabble roused with my fellow sports fans. I rooted for my friends teams. I had a good time.
There is something important about perspective that AmandaB failed to mention when she regaled all audience members with our text message conversation. It came later, during the Patriots game, when they were ever so slightly down (before they eventually won):
AmberN: We should always be happy for a good football game, no matter the outcome.
AmandaB: Omg NEVER. Want a blowout!
AmberN: Lol. Such an optimist. Clearly born of a winning team. I suppose that is why you can muster the tears when you lose.
After the Seahawks lost to the Falcons, bar friends and friends on text message alike reminded me that "At least it wasn't an embarrassing loss." Or, "They fought a good fight." And it was true. Those last 5 minutes on the clock were exciting football, exactly what you hope your team is capable of, that last gasp rally.
But this is the attitude of someone whose team never wins, who, in fact, even while hopeful, you see that coffin through the window.
To date, I felt more hope this season than I had previously. Even more than the year we actually went to the superbowl. You see, unlike then, I truly believed in our QB and our running back. We had this young golden boy, we had beast mode, we had the psychic Mebane. But even with all of that, my heart was stayed. Guarded. Steeled against the eventual dawn.
So no, I didn't cry. I just went quietly into the light and then looked down the road for the next game.
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